When Actions Do Really Speak Louder Than Words

Small broken promises, are broken promises.

They say they would call, but they don’t.

They say they will visit later, but they don’t and won’t even call to let you know that they won’t be coming.  

They tell you things will get better, the bad things won’t happen again but it still does.

It is not uncommon for our relationships with different people, but most especially the relationship we hold dearest like that with our partners or with our spouses to be the cause of anxiety and turmoil within us when things aren’t going the way they are supposed to.  Situations like that raises questions that we go around groping answers for and sometimes the answer can be so obvious but as human beings we are blind to them especially if those answers are not what we want.  

It hurts all the more when we put in so much effort and the other person we seek to please takes our efforts for granted.  Like when we dress up for the evening and when our dates arrive, they don’t notice.  This can happen once too often and more often than not, our hearts are worn down from waiting for them to arrive, waiting for them to notice, waiting for things to change for the better.   We keep hoping and every time we are disappointed, a piece of us dies.  And when finally we lose ourselves, they decide to move one with someone new.

Be wary.  Pause and observe these people you hold close to your heart.  Listen to what they tell you and watch what they do.  Do they do as they say?  Small things are important, because as cliche as it sounds, it is the small things that count.  Do they call when they say they will?  Do arrive at the time they say they will be here?

Be smart enough to know the difference, too, and be prepared to deal with it.  As soon as you see these signs, you might need to tell them what you expect from them and ask them what they expect from you as well.  If things still don’t change and you have waited, tried reaching out and waited some more, it is time to face facts as these actions do speak louder than words, and ask yourself – do they make you feel like you matter to them?  Is this how you want things to be with this person?  The thing is, if you don’t face the truth now and stay in the same rut, you could miss out on the opportunity of meeting the right person and look forward to a life of sadness and feeling unimportant.

Do yourself a favor, stop making excuses.  Work harder to engage your  partner towards a healthier relationship if you will but stop the just waiting for him to call, for things to change.  Heal so you can help the situation heal.  If it won’t, at least you are strong enough to pull away.   You have not allowed yourself to sink in an ocean of misery.  Remember, people change when you change, but that change must come from within. You must be whole and happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone and be one with them.  Always make that choice to be happy and in that way, you can preserve YOU.